I was born in Greece, the home of olives and grapes. I studied Economics and had a successful career in IT before stumbling across Life Coaching and NLP. Today, I’m an NLP trainer, a Life Coach, a wife, a mother, a world traveller. Nothing gives me more joy than sharing what I’ve learnt, and am still learning, with you. Read more
I am a product of sex and so are you!
And that’s an undeniable fact! On top of that, throw in the immense pleasure of having great sex and the undeniable health benefits that come with it, and you’d think that would make it the first thing we’d be grateful for at the beginning or end of each day.
And yet, do we ever talk about sex or express our gratitude? Properly, on a deeper level?
Maybe not the easiest conversation at first but it’s the eternal ‘not talking’ about it that got us here today. We turned a precious gift to a word related to some of the world’s most uncomfortable, painful and atrocious events. So, how do we start the discussion and what form should it take?
There are some things we only admit to ourselves (and sometimes we daren’t even do that). We all have our own blockages of ‘expressing’ freely and ecologically … and not just about sex.
Way before sex, we have got to talk about emotions. They are an undeniable thermostat of our needs and wants. It is not about the act of sex, is it? Once you start the internal dialogue in general, you start ‘growing’. You reflect on what drives you and puts a smile on your face. You touch on your inspiration and motivation!
You become more aware how you prefer your coffee, your car, your holiday. Eventually, sexing up becomes easier: How do I like my sex? What was the best sex I ever had? What were the ingredients? What was my parents’ sex life? What is the impact on my own sex life? When is it time to speak up and shut up about sex? Who do you need to forgive to have great sex? More emotions surface to give us clues for answers and directions.
The more we get a better understanding of us, we can then express it and explain it better to others. We are better equipped and prepared for connection!
Work out what inspires YOU!
When two people fall in love, it’s often because they are moved by similar pieces of inspiration. They become mirrors of each other’s aspirations and dreams. Who do you choose to spend time with? Who becomes the item of your fascination? What are qualities that lift you up? Be that person yourself, get these qualities yourself. Focus on working on YOU! The other person is just a reflection of who you long to be and of what you long to do and have.
It’s time to stand tall
When we keep chasing to get inspired by others, load others with our expectations, stay in relationships where we blame the others, we know it is time to look within us and fill up our bucket of self-awareness and self-acceptance more. Wake up every morning and know YOU are responsible to make yourself happy! It is nobody else’s job to do that. If you are not having much fun right now, do something about it yourself!
When you do your part, the world around you follow. It will take some steps. You may consciously understand what you need to do but you still have to re-code habits and the biases of centuries. You will stumble and stand tall again. It’s OK, now you start feeling the empowerment. Good for sex!
My kids have a sexual education workshop scheduled next week and I’m wondering… Will it be about being cautious? Will they teach the kids about using protection? Will they cover the biology and the birds and the bees? I hope so!
I also hope they tell them about emotional expression and open communication. I hope they suggest to them writing about what makes them happy, excited, angry and sad and share regularly. Tell them to take their time, not because their parents or religion ask them to but because it in their best interest to build character first and create an interesting personality who is emotionally fit. Tell them to make themselves happy. Excite them with their own responsibility to find what makes them tick. Check how often they smile from the heart and feel good about themselves. The rest happens in good time.
If we did not finish the degree we wanted, we did not travel to places we dreamt and we did not have the results we wanted for ourselves, we have overlooked our heart’s song. We make our dissatisfaction appear as someone else’s problem. We need someone obliged to tell us millions of times how lovable we are, but it is never enough, is it? This is bad sex! We ask forcefully someone to be our crutch.
Life is sexy!
Just like wellness or disease, it first starts mentally, emotionally and spiritually and then gets manifested physically. The physical part is just the final product, the painter’s painting, the writer’s book. But when we admire a painting or a book, we marvel at the creator’s imagination and creativity, their soul and inventiveness. Work on your self-belief and self-esteem and soon, not only will your sex life improve, but so will your health, wealth, relationships and peace of mind! Because you are in fact, one sexy beast!
My sex partner just walked in!
I kid you not, it’s midday and as I am writing this, my husband just came in from work unexpectedly. He’d forgotten to take money with him. He looked at ‘Sex up’ and gave feedback. Great timing! I could tell you we had sex, but we didn’t. We prepared soup together and ate it. We laughed a lot!